Why I have difficulty writing haiku (3)

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Why I have difficulty writing haiku

problem with haiku
definite article is
first casualty

next casualty
indefinite article
makes me sound little

like Japanese guard
in prison camp in movie
world war two movie

who for some reason
is speaking English (how? why?)
with staccato voice

or perhaps I am
po-faced guru on mountain
dispensing bromides:

crow flies at midnight
in front of luminous moon
affair ends badly

all because I am
in service to, at mercy
of, syllable count

here it comes again
surplus syllable flop sweat
haiku-tortured night.

Over at Desperate Poets, Shay asks :

“What subject, genre, sacred cow, or literary convention do you ache to spin until it’s dizzy? What mask do you long to pull off and drag a confession out of its wearer? What accepted wisdom do you long to expose as horsefeathers? Or perhaps you just want to set your keyboard on “stun” and knock us over with your unexpected use of language? Come on, flout convention! Irony and all major credit cards accepted. Unreliable narrators welcome.”

This is a post from a while back but with a new verse!

14 thoughts on “Why I have difficulty writing haiku (3)”

  2. fireblossom32's avatarfireblossom32

    It is well known that I can’t stand haiku 9as Sherry points out), ir more accurately, “fauxku” which isn’t true haiku at all, though it follows the syllable count. Here you have lampooned such stuff as it so richly deserves.

    cherry blossom falls
    banana peel trips Sensei
    his sandal takes flight

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  6. hedgewitch's avatarhedgewitch

    Definitely aced it with this one, Jim. Every little syllable-tortured stanza is rich and ripe with satire and skill. True haiku is a thing of beauty(if to my mind, not comfortable to slip into) but the craze to play with it like a sad baby animal trapped by ten-year olds is perhaps the worst influence ever to enter Western poetry. Good stuff.

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